


What are the Princes doing in Stockholm? The answer may shock you

by henriettaholden



Category: Red White & Royal Blue - Casey McQuiston
Genre: Eurovision, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-08
Updated: 2019-09-08
Packaged: 2020-10-12 08:21:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20561201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/henriettaholden/pseuds/henriettaholden
Summary: June doesn't get paid much as a journo, but as a ghost writer for her favorite trash magazine...well, just call her 'palace insider'.





	What are the Princes doing in Stockholm? The answer may shock you

**Author's Note:**

> Does North America call pedestal fans pedestal fans? Please excuse any liberties taken with both language and description as I am but an Aussie writing about Sweden and the US.   
However, my knowledge of Eurovision for the last decade is impeccable.

If Alex's voice could travel across the Atlantic, his yell of "JUNE!" wouldn't have required a two am wake up call.

To be fair, she deserved it.

"Attending EUROVISION?! How could you out us like that?"

Being a staff writer for the New Yorker paid okay, but she got the real bucks ghost writing as 'Miss Binkie Plumpton from York' for Royal Weekly. 

Nora helped choose the name. 

Alex was still yelling but June was mostly trying to drown him out by sticking her head in front of the pedestal fan. It was only partially working, both with dulling Alex's voice to a low roar and keeping her cool. Every summer she was rudely reminded that New York was the arm pits of America. 

She considered tuning back into Alex but decided to just hang up. She was going to make an air tent with her duvet. Alex could wait until morning. 

~

_Meanwhile, in Stockholm_.

Henry was still blearily reading June's piece on the Royal Weekly website. He'd awoken to Alex shrieking, and just rolled over and grabbed his phone. This was an unfortunate common wake up routine. 

_Prince Charming and Prince Henry were spotted walking away from the ABBA museum in Stockholm, looking particularly dapper in their vacation resort wear by Thom Browne and Orlebar Brown respectively. _

Well that explains why Alex was muttering Abba and curse words and looking at his phone as if it just committed murder. 

Henry looked back at the article and read _Palace insiders have confirmed the rega(y)l couple are in Stockholm to see the Eurovision Grand Finale and catch up with the hunky Prince Carl of Sweden [pictured below]. _

_"Prince Consort Alex is very excited to be witnessing his first Eurovision," said the palace insider. They confirmed he'd been watching it for years._

_"He doesn't understand how Montenegro isn't consistently voted into the final."_

_It has also been revealed that Prince Consort Alex likes to exercise to Eurovision soundtracks. According to the palace insider, if he isn't "talking someone's face off about politics" he can be found on the elliptical singing along to Conchita Wurst's 2014 winning song, "Rise like a phoenix"._

_It has been said he is als_o _partial to Sweden's winning 2012 entry, Euphoria by Loreen._

Henry now understood why Alex was livid. He thought of emailing June 'rega(y)l'? Really?' but he thought better of it and closed his eyes. He had almost fallen back into the land of nod until Alex pounded on his arm.

"How could she betray me like this? Normally she writes nonsense!"

Henry smothered him with a pillow. There would be no sleeping now. 

~

It immediately got worse. 

Nora did not stop sending memes of bald eagles using gym equipment. Someone was butchering photoshop superimposing his head onto the eagle's and Alex did not like it. 

Zahra and Raf just sent 'hahahaha' about four billion times. ‘Tough luck Claremont,' said his father. 

His mother did not reply. 

The last straw was Liam sending a picture of a magazine at CVS with Alex and Henry's faces superimposed on the female members of Abba with the headline 'Dancing Queens'. Problematic as that was, Alex was more irrationally angry about the picture depicting Waterloo ABBA not Dancing Queen. 

"It's the wrong song, Henry."

"Ah huh." He continued drinking his coffee and reading the Guardian. Where did he even get a copy of that?

"A very simple google could have properly informed the editor."

Henry just looked at him. From all the years of their relationship, his eyes were indicating exactly what he was thinking of Alex. And that was '_you're being ridiculous but I love you but also why me?_'

It was a complicated look. Henry put the paper down.

"What are you actually upset about?"

"Babe, I didn't want this vacation to turn into the normal circus." He wasn't whining. He crossed his arms then immediately uncrossed them. He picked up his fork and moved his breakfast ham around his plate, careful not to touch the cod roe spread. Alex did not need caviar in his diet for lunch or dinner, let alone breakfast.

"Ah huh." Henry moved towards picking up the paper but Alex stopped him. 

"I mean I just wanted us to disappear in the crowd and be Henry and Alex, not my stupid pap name June freaking misappropriated and Prince of England. I wanted a weekend of just us."

Henry smiled that special 'many years of putting up with you being sweet in a roundabout way' relationship smile and placed his hand over Alex's. 

"So, embarrassment had nothing to do with it?"

"Urgh!" Alex took back his hand and picked up the ham and immediately spat it out. Roe no.

~

The backstage area was bustling and Alex could not be more excited. And not just because he was going to meet Graham Norton. Even though Henry declined the invite, which Alex was sure the palace was pleased about, he could see the environment was getting to Henry too. 

The escort through the backstage area had Alex forgetting he was about to redeem himself of his sister's vicious slander on international television. 

Before he knew it, he was in front of Graham Norton and Henry had been whisked away by some Swedish official. Alex hoped that the official was prepared to watch overly enthusiastic white people dancing from Prince Henry because Alex was not letting them go to Eurovision without getting some moves out of him.

Alex focused back on the interview with Graham Norton, star struck for about a second until he was asked, "So why Eurovision?"

The international Eurovision watching community was not ready for the explanation of Alex's master’s thesis on _European geo-politics and law reform: a direct causation from Eurovision voting blocks_.

~

A sea away, June cackled. 

**Author's Note:**

> My soundtrack for this fic was:   
Sanna Nielsen - Undo - Eurovision Song Contest 2014   
Loreen - Euphoria - Eurovision Song Contest 2012   
Conchita Wurst - Rise Like a Phoenix - Eurovision Song Contest 2014   
Alexander Rybak - Fairytale - Eurovision Song Contest 2009   
Lena - Satellite - Eurovision Song Contest 2010   
Loïc Nottet - Rhythm Inside - Eurovision Song Contest 2015   
ABBA - Dancing Queen   
DoReDoS - My Lucky Day - Eurovision Song Contest 2018  
Måns Zelmerlöw - Heroes - Eurovision Song Contest 2015   
Mørland & Debrah Scarlett - A Monster Like Me - Eurovision Song Contest 2015   
Mikolas Josef - Lie To Me - Eurovision Song Contest 2018  
Jamala - 1944 -Eurovision Song Contest 2016   
Elina Born & Stig Rästa - Goodbye To Yesterday - Eurovision Song Contest 2015  
Amanita - Love Injected - Eurovision Song Contest 2015  
Valentina Monetta - Crisalide (Vola) - Eurovision Song Contest 2013   
Nina Sublatti - Warrior - Eurovision Song Contest 2015  
Paula Seling & Ovi - Playing With Fire - Eurovision Song Contest 2010   
Can Bonomo - Love Me Back - Eurovision Song Contest 2012  
Eleni Foureira - Fuego - Eurovision Song Contest 2018  
Netta - Toy - Eurovision Song Contest 2018  
Robin Bengtsson - I Can't Go On - Eurovision Song Contest 2017  
Sunstroke Project & Olia Tira - Run Away Eurovision Song Contest 2010
> 
> and lastly my all time favourite Eurovision song:   
Who See - Igranka - Eurovision Song Contest 2013


End file.
